Dear Dr. Frisch,
Am I asking you to apologize to me? No. An apology extracted on demand is worth very little and an apology given grudgingly is worth nothing at all.
There are many people to whom you owe an apology, but until you feel remorse for the way you have talked about others there is no point of asking.
As a parent who has lost a child and who has others living, I know what it is like to bring a child into the world. From the moment one knows of an impending birth, a parent begins to create a life for that child. A good parent allows the child to develop in his/her own way and adjusts that dream to the child.
Therefore, I am asking you not to apologize to me, but instead, to your own parents. These good people brought you into this world, nurtured you and supported you to adulthood. They have adjusted their dreams as you have grown. I am sure that these two good people were so proud of you as you demonstrated your achievement in school and college. Like most parents, they supported you through your journey from adolescence to adulthood. They were proud beyond belief when you received your PhD from the University of Pennsylvania. They were proud when you worked for the National Science Foundation. They were proud when you became an adjunct professor at the University of Oregon.
What you have done to yourself in the last year has been nothing less than horrible, to not only yourself and your career but also to the dreams of those two good people. You owe them better. You owe them your sincere apology.